Andile ‘Dj Andy X’ Xolo and his wife, Lebogang, have been married for 10 years. They have two kids together: Andy’s step-daughter Palesa, 15, and their son, Oluthando, 8.
‘Andy and I met in Swaziland at a New Year’s Eve Party. I went on a road trip with my best friend and her husband and we were coming from Joburg, while Andy travelled from Durban. We were in a long-distance relationship for some months before he decided he wanted to be close to me, so he moved to Joburg, and within a year he’d proposed. He asked my daughter Palesa if he could marry me. She held the ring while he proposed on bended knee,’ Lebogang explains.
This is Lebogang’s second marriage, and after a traumatic divorce, counts meeting Andy as a gift from God. ‘My previous marriage lasted only a year, but I’m grateful for the experience, because it left me with my most wonderful blessing, my daughter.’
For a long while after her divorce, Lebogang didn’t feel comfortable introducing anyone to Palesa until she was certain he’d be in for the long haul. ‘I knew when the time was right to introduce them. He came from Durban to meet her; the three of us went on a date and he flew back home. She was four years old at the time. How they interacted was extremely important to me because I trust my daughter’s judgement, and kids are generally very intuitive. If feel if they hadn’t clicked, we wouldn’t be where we are today. Luckily they hit it off and that gave me some peace of mind.’
Naturally, Palesa fought for her mom’s attention in the beginning, and the couple had to reassure her that she’s the most important person in both their lives. Andile also had to adjust to being a step-dad, while trying not to overwhelm Palesa. ‘Lebogang and I had to be clear on how to handle things. We never disagreed in front of her and we made a pact that all our kids would be raised the same way. So even when I went to my wife about issues, she’s say: “Do as you see fit, you’re also a parent”. Palesa taught me how to be a father, because suddenly I had a firstborn who I had to help shape into a responsible human being. That was and still is a wonderful experience for me,’ Andile recalls. ‘Then one day, she called me Papa Andy, and that stuck. That gave us comfort that everything would work out just fine.’
From then on, the family blended seamlessly and have shared an unbreakable bond. ‘It might sound like a fairy tale, but we somehow just fit like a puzzle. I think what made things easy is how Lebogang and I were both raised. We both knew the importance of speaking in one voice, having goals, and encouraging one another. We both wanted a loving and safe home for our kids to be proud of. We live for our kids and we see the appreciation in their eyes every day.’
In 2012, the couple welcomed a new addition to the family, their son Oluthando. ‘I love being a DJ and connecting with people through music; but my greatest achievement is being a father. While cheers and praises from the crowds on dance floors send my heart racing, it’s really the good night hugs and kisses that I look forward to the most. Kids love you unconditionally; you may have some faults as we’re all human, but in their eyes you’re perfect,’ says Andile.
Continue reading your story on the app
Continue reading your story in the magazine
LOCAL FASHION BRANDS ARE HELPING US BECOME MORE CONSCIOUS SHOPPERS IN THIS EVER-CHANGING WORLD, WITH THEIR BEAUTIFULLY CRAFTED ECO-FRIENDLY WARDROBE PIECES
EVER NOTICE HOW YOUR CHILD’S BIONIC EARS PICK UP EVERY WORD OF YOUR PRIVATE CONVERSATIONS, YET COMPLETELY TUNE OUT WHEN YOU REALLY NEED THEM TO LISTEN? OUR EXPERTS OFFER SOME CONSTRUCTIVE ADVICE ON HOW TO MAKE YOURSELF HEARD
Blood couldn't make us any closer'
THE TITLE OF ‘DAD’ DOESN’T ONLY BELONG TO SOMEONE YOU SHARE DNA WITH. THESE MEN HAVE FILLED THE FATHER FIGURE ROLE AND RAISED THEIR CHILDREN AS THEIR OWN
Cosmetic Treatments: Everything You Need To Know
Considering a cosmetic procedure, but aren’t sure what to expect? Cape town based general and aesthetic practitioner dr jan nel offers his valuable insights
How To... Make Gluten-Free Flours
Prepare these gluten-free flours to replace cake flour or self-raising flour in your favourite recipes!
Quaran-Teens Help Them Manage Their Mental Health
Teens climbing the walls during covid-19? Restlessness isn’t the only thing to be concerned about, writes daniella renzon, community service clinical psychologist
Going Through A Friendship Crisis?
Is your waning social life affecting your marriage?
Pandemic panic, brain fog and ocd… as you get back to life un-usual, psychologist marise swart shares some advice on some common issues that may affect your mental health
Beat The Disease To Please
Is saying ‘yes’ is a habit that’s leaving your own needs constantly overlooked, as you put everyone else’s needs before yours? How can you break the cycle of people- pleasing and put yourself first?
Know Your Headache Migraine, Tension Or Cluster?
It’s common for people to refer to any splitting headache as a migraine, but this might not always be the case
ARE YOU BLUEWATER READY?
WHAT ARE THE SKILLS YOU NEED BEFORE CASTING OFF ON A TRANSOCEAN OR BLUEWATER ADVENTURE? OFFSHORE TRAINING SKIPPERS SHARE THEIR ADVICE
Daniel Dae Kim built a career by picking his battles, walking away from a job only when the inequities got too big to ignore. He still believes Hollywood can be reformed.
GH: ALEXIS FACES THE MUSIC
Tensions are running high for Alexis and her loved ones when the disgraced and disbarred attorney, who is facing charges of attempted murder for her stabbing of Dante, arrives for her sentencing.
GH SCRIBES ON THE FALLOUT FROM FRANCO'S DEATH
Franco’s shocking demise at the hands of Peter have left Elizabeth fans wondering what the future holds for Franco’s widow — and for his killer, Peter.
SCIENCE PANEL: CONSIDER AIR COOLING TECH AS CLIMATE BACK-UP
The U.S. must seriously consider the idea of tinkering with the atmosphere to cool a warming Earth and accelerate research into how and whether humanity should hack the planet, the National Academy of Sciences said.
TWO SPACE FANS GET SEATS ON BILLIONAIRE'S PRIVATE FLIGHT
A billionaire’s private SpaceX flight filled its two remaining seats this week with a scientist-teacher and a data engineer whose college friend actually won a spot but gave him the prize.
New Avenue for Kids
Organization Offers Education, Opportunity and Support for Community
RIHANNA FEARS CHRIS IS OUT OF THIS WORLD!
KOOKY Chris Brown’s spacey social media posts about aliens have close pals concerned about the R&B crooner — including his once-battered ex Rihanna, sources spilled.
Four pounds of fortuitous timing
The cheesecake with a story good enough to eat
A rising conservative star on TikTok.