HAPPINESS IN AN Interconnected World

A common piece of advice is, "Don't let your happiness depend on others." KARISHAM KARA, a college student in South Africa, recognizes that as much as we strive to be independent we are inevitably interconnected and need one another to thrive and survive. Here she offers 8 tips to find happiness while balancing independence and interdependence.

- KARISHAM KARA,

I always thought I'd feel more settled in myself and less reliant on others as I grew up. In the last few years, however, I have realized how interconnected the world is. Nature has so intricately organized herself into a system where everything relies on everything else to grow. No plant grows in a vacuum without external aid. The earthworms are needed to break down matter and create nutrient-dense soil, and the bees are needed to pollinate flowers to create seeds. In the same way, we rely on businesses to employ us or on customers to sustain our businesses. Nothing escapes the webbed arrangement of nature.

So, when I hear the advice "Never let your happiness depend on others,” or “Happiness should come from within,” or “Don't expect anything from anyone,” I feel baffled, because the actions of others do make us unhappy sometimes, and they do affect our quality of life. No matter how hard we try to be self reliant, at the end of the day we live in a community, and we have to lean on others at times. It feels unjust to pin the reason for our unhappiness on ourselves when we are not the reason for it, and when we are trying our best to take everything positively and grow. Often we feel stuck because of something that someone else said or did to us.

So, I've been pondering how to create our own happiness in an interconnected world. I'm nowhere near understanding all the answers, but my but my dad likes to say that nobody has the whole puzzle, we just have the pieces.

Here are 8 tips for finding happiness.

1. Judge the level of control you have over a situation