Le weekend present, but not correct

You have been invited to the country. Should you take a thank-you gift for your host? And, if so, what?

- ROBERT GIBBONS

A great deal has been written about weekends, that time between Friday and Sunday that remains such an enduring part of our social fabric. Invented by the English and taken to heart by the French, who unusually for them took an English word and made it their own, Le Weekend remains a constant feature in a changing world. Being invited away for the weekend – and by away I mean to the countryside – still remains one of the more pleasurable invitations you can receive, subject only to who is inviting you. I was reminded of all this when a friend emailed me the other day saying he and his wife had been invited away for the weekend to Yorkshire and wanted to know what they should take as a present. It is not something I often get asked but it made me ponder on how I should reply.

Indeed, what, if anything, should be given as a house present? There are those who do not believe in taking a gift, working on the principle that their presence as opposed to their present is sufficient and quite happily accept an invitation on that basis. If a frequent visitor, their hosts will know the form and not expect their guests to come bearing gifts. If and when ever they get invited back they adopt a similar policy. There is something to be said for mutual abstinence. However, there is a danger here similar to that of the host who says as you depart, “Oh, don’t bother to write,” and then gets annoyed when no bread and butter letter is received. “You know, they never wrote to say thank you.”