"Fret is always there, nagging like the itch of a horseily bite"

With devastating biodiversity losses and a climate in chaos, it's not surprising that we are increasingly anxious about the state of our planet

- By Lucy Lapwing

I'm worrying again. It's that familiar, gut-deep tug. Clenched teeth and furrowed brow. Not a single dandelion left, not one! I tear up at the roadside, feeling simultaneously silly and furious.

It's a morning in late April, spring has barely got started, and yet it has begun. The cutting. The mowing, the strimming, and hacking. I'm standing by a busy A-road, near the supermarket, watching a lad on a giant mower annihilate a bank of basking dandelions and bobbing cowslips. How anyone can mow a cowslip I don't understand. These butter-yellow wildflowers are the sunny faces of spring! They cause no harm, nor do they obstruct views on roads, or scratch or sting. Yet we mow them down - it's heartbreaking. I bend down and pick up a slightly wilting, severed flower, twirling it between my fingers.

A horrible sensation sits in my tummy for the rest of the day. I find myself feeling sad as I drink my brew after lunch. This incident is just one small patch of cowslips, but it's indicative of a bigger problem. The same can be said for my mood. The amount of time I spend in a state of worry seems to be on the up. Fret is always there, nagging like the incessant itch of a fresh horsefly bite.

There's a word for this feeling: eco-anxiety. Several years ago, whilst volunteering at RSPB Loch Garten, I found myself experiencing a complex potion of emotions: worry, sadness and despair. These were sensations that sat heavily in my chest and over time seemed to swell, like a plant's roots growing too big for its pot. I remember chatting with an older lady in the osprey centre. We spoke about the news and our perceptions of impending doom. We embraced; strangers sharing a cuddle, tears sparkling in the corners of our eyes. "Eco-dreads" we giggled awkwardly as we came up with a name for the uncomfortable feeling we shared.