They bring hope and healing to our military families

When Bonnie Carroll lost her husband, a brigadier general in the National Guard, she was surprised to learn the armed forces didn't offer formal emotional support groups. No one should go through this alone, she thought, so she started her own!

- Kellie B. Gormly

On a cold day in November of 1992, Bonnie Carroll’s husband, Tom, a brigadier general in the Alaska National Guard, and seven other Guardsmen, were on a routine flight when their plane crashed in the Alaska mountains, killing all aboard— and completely shattering Bonnie’s life.

Bonnie was a major in the Air Force Reserve when she met Tom in 1988, while they were both part of a rescue effort to free three whales that had become trapped under Alaskan ice. From the moment they met, they felt an undeniable connection. Within months, they married and had a blissful life together that included two foster teenagers, horses and dogs. They packed every moment with love and joy.

But now, Tom was gone.

I’ve been in the military. I’m tough. I’ve got this, Bonnie thought. But, soon, the depth of her loss hit hard. When she’d lost Tom, she’d lost a part of herself.

Feeling overwhelmed and alone, Bonnie sought out emotional support services from the military and was frustrated to discover there weren’t any.

Over the next two years, as Bonnie worked through her grief, she discussed the absence of bereavement services with the Veterans Affairs and Department of Defense leaders, but was making little headway.

Nobody should have to deal with this grief alone, Bonnie thought. And, finally, she realized it was time to stop talking and take action.

I will fill the void myself, she decided.

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