Changing a CHILD'S LIFE

Three women open up about the personal journeys that led them to adoption

-  GILLIAN HARVEY

'It's the greatest privilege of my life'

Rachel Connor, 42, a healthcare worker, lives in Buckinghamshire with her husband Lewis, 43, and their daughter Winnie, three.

I'll never forget the first time we saw our daughter Winnie. Lewis and I were waiting in her foster parents' sitting room, and I was trying to make small talk and failing due to nerves. The moment she walked into the room, she looked at us and smiled.

It was love at first sight.

Lewis and I married in 2019. Already in our late 30s, we began trying for a baby as soon as we could. After six months, we were advised to have tests before being told our best course of action would be IVF. As we weren't eligible for NHS treatment, we considered self-funding. But having already experienced six months of symptom-spotting, testing and worrying, we realised it was a road we didn't want to go down.

My mum had worked in adoption in the past, so it was always something I'd thought about. When we decided to go for it in January 2022, it was as if a weight had been lifted.

The months-long process threw up a few surprises - there's a lot of training and also moral dilemmas to talk through - could you cope with a child who had a disability or was traumatised, for example? It's a lot to consider, but I understand how important it is that agencies get it right.

Finally, in November 2022, we were approved. In January 2023, we saw the profile of 13-month-old Winnie on the adoption system - and we just knew. We applied to be her parents and the process began. In early July, we started the transition process - meeting Winnie's foster carers and spending time with her at her home. Two weeks on, she was officially placed with us.