How spouses retiring at different times can avoid money clashes

Before Jeffrey Holtaway retired in 2017 from the public health field, he and his wife Diane talked a lot about money. Mrs Holtaway, who was still working at Rutgers University, planned to stay at her job so they wouldn’t need to tap their retirement funds right away.

- Tammy LaGorce

“We knew in advance the first years would be kind of tough,” Mrs Holtaway, 66, said. But she supported her husband’s decision to retire at 60, a plan their financial adviser had approved.

The jump from two pay cheques to one salary and a pension, however, was bumpier than she expected.

“It was hard to predict how it makes you feel when you're living through such a significant change,” said Mrs Holtaway, who retired from Rutgers in 2021. The couple had tried to prepare: Between their retirements, they downsized from a house to a condominium; bought a used car instead of a new one; and became increasingly cautious about smaller expenses.

“The money for eating out, gifts, unexpected car and home repairs, vet bills and travel is where we really had to readjust,” Mrs Holtaway said. “We simply weren't able to do the things that we were used to doing.”

Research shows that many couples in the US expect that each partner will retire at the same time, even though gaps in their retirement timelines are more common than not. Among retired respondents in a 2024 study by Ameriprise, a financial services firm, just 11 per cent of partners retired together, while 62 per cent staggered their dates by at least a year.

But only 39 per cent of respondents who hadn't retired yet anticipated working more than a year after their partner stopped. Conflicts over money can be common during those gap years.