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Could dementia be behind my wife's worrying change?

The Independent

|

September 11, 2025

The Indy's agony aunt Victoria Richards is here to help

Could dementia be behind my wife's worrying change?

Dear Vix, I've been with my incredible wife for almost 20 years.

We met later in life and already had our own families, but over time we've become one. My wife has always been an avid and talented swimmer, competing in competitions around the world. Her mind has always been razor-sharp too; she's full of wit and kindness, and is certainly the joker of the family, but recently she’s been changing - seemingly without reason - and now I'm fraught with anxiety and worry for her.

My wife is a former teacher and retired two years ago, but over the last year or so she’s become noticeably different. She’s uncharacteristically struggling with her memory. Her ability to remember recent conversations or events seems almost nonexistent. Her moods are increasingly unpredictable, too. It’s hard to tell from one day to the next if she'll be happy, sad or something else entirely. I think it might be dementia, having witnessed my own mother live with the condition, but I don’t want to label anything without speaking to our GP. It wouldn't be right or fair.

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