Writing helped save drug addict

Now a wellness coach and author, Tendani Mulaudzi helps others heal from addiction and trauma using storytelling and personal support

- Aarti Bhana

Tendani Mulaudzi once envisioned a future in courtrooms and news-rooms.

A sharp student with ambitions of becoming a lawyer and later a hard news journalist, she was poised to follow a conventional path to success.

But before she could cross that threshold, addiction intervened. Her descent started in school, at the age of 14, where harmful substances offered a shortcut to belonging.

But each time the euphoria faded, Mulaudzi was left to deal with her difficulties alone.

She spent three years in a rehabilitation centre as a patient and a counsellor fighting through relapses, loneliness and with herself - before she discovered writing as a way to heal. She used it to transform her life and help others.

"Whatever I was using was a way to escape any feelings. It would make me feel numb for a little bit, and then I'd do something stupid, or I would hurt someone, I'd hurt myself, or I'd embarrass myself, and then that shame would come back," she said.

"It's like a vicious cycle, because I keep on trying to numb my shame, but I'm constantly putting myself in situations [where] I actually get more shameful as the time goes by."

Mulaudzi was 14 when she started drinking alcohol - socially at first to feel accepted by her school friends but moved on to experiment with harder drugs that gradually disrupted every area of her life.

"I remember trying MDMA and I loved it, because it's like a love drug. You just feel euphoric and you want to hug everyone and love everyone. That's when I would say things started to get a bit tricky for me, and I would find any excuse I could to use MDMA [ecstasy]."