I went to 'family constellations' session, it changed my life

Imagine you could watch a group of strangers act out your innermost private feelings and relationships with family members—with intense and uncanny accuracy. That's what happened when I found myself sitting in an armchair, slack-jawed and bewildered, as constellation facilitator Els van Steijn, her team and my friend moved around a room in central London.

- Hannah Ewens, The Independent

In this “family constellations” session, my friend — who joined for moral support but is now going above and beyond the call of duty by playing me—says her feet are stuck in concrete and she feels dissociated, like she’s off in a dream world. My mother is crouched and hiding behind me, while my dad is off staring at his own father. With every question Van Steijn puts to either the pretend me or my pretend relatives, they fast-forward through key dynamics in my family history. Some events and feelings I knew about, but there were more secretive issues even I was not privy to and Van Steijn could not have known. Yet, later, checking facts with members of my real family, they would turn out to be entirely correct.