The secret of MY SON'S FATHER

Against her better judgement, Sarah * became the ‘other woman’ and the single parent of a son who has never met his father

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I would never have an affair with a married man, I used to say. Until I did. Far from the classic scenario, where the other woman knows nothing about his marriage, I did. You see, he was my best friend. I was at the wedding to his college sweetheart.

If you’re reading this as a wife, I am aware you must think I’m heartless. I don’t expect sympathy – if I were someone’s wife I’d be thinking that as well – but it’s too simplistic to paint him as merely a philandering git, me as the cold-hearted mistress, his wife as the helpless victim. And love has a way of changing your moral compass.

We had worked together for several years, sitting opposite one another at a design studio. We flirted, went to football matches together, danced at office parties.

Complete trust

‘I’ve often wondered what life would be like if I was married to you instead,’ he told me. I was adamant nothing was going to happen – he had two children. But, as we grew closer, he confided in me that his marriage was in trouble.

It all sounds incredibly naive now, but I became his shoulder to cry on. I lowered the barriers and let myself fall in love. We spent every moment we could together, and I trusted him completely. We created opportunities to work together, walked miles at lunchtime to grab a sandwich in each other’s company, and, when this wasn’t possible, met for 10 minutes after work. Little gestures meant so much to me.