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'It's Very Lonely When Your Partner Has Cancer...

Woman & Home

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May 2019

Many men shy away from talking about symptoms of testicular cancer, but early diagnosis makes all the difference. Here, Stephanie Nimmo shares the experience of her friends, TV comedy writers Graham and Helen Linehan

'It's Very Lonely When Your Partner Has Cancer...

While I was out walking my dog my friend Helen rang. “Steph, we’ve had bad news,” she said. “Graham has cancer.”

In comedy circles Helen and Graham Linehan are a power couple. She is part of the team behind the BBC series Motherland, and Graham is the BAFTA and Emmy award-winning genius behind Father Ted. But that word – cancer – had reduced my strong, funny, practical friend to a quivering mess.

I know that feeling all too well. My own husband Andy was diagnosed with colorectal cancer four years ago. The symptoms came on really suddenly, and we were told Andy’s cancer was already staged four and incurable. Your world shatters and the person you want to talk to, to lean on and share with is the one who has the diagnosis. All you can do is try to hold it together for them. Andy died a year after his diagnosis, aged 52.

Graham had just turned 50 when he told Helen that one of his testicles “didn’t feel right”. His symptoms were minimal – just a vague discomfort – but enough to make him feel concerned. She made a GP appointment for him, and the doctor decided to send him for further tests. A week later he went alone to their local NHS hospital for an ultrasound scan. Helen kept herself busy with a planned end-of-Year 6 SATs party for her son and his friends.

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