Should You Stay Or Should You Go?

CLEO Singapore|September 2018

Should You Stay Or Should You Go?

He says he’s not ready to be serious – should you stay or should you go? We get dating experts to clue us in…

Sophie Hong

Explanation #1:

He’s not sure about you… yet

“He’s telling you how he really feels, which is: ‘I’m not ready to get into a relationship with you right now. This doesn’t mean that I won’t change my mind in the future, but for now, we will not be in a serious relationship,’” explains Angela.

It’s easy to be hurt by this, but remember that you need to give people time to fall in love with you. Angela’s advice in such situations is to accept this calmly, prioritise him less, and only give him what he’s willing to invest. This means you shouldn’t clear your schedule just to accommodate him, and you should even start dating other people. “Meet him only when you’re truly available,” she says. As miffed as you might be about his indecision, Angela says displaying your unhappiness via petty behaviour can just make him nope the eff out of this non-relationship.

Explanation #2:

The timing is off

Let’s be real here: life does get in the way sometimes. Rom-coms have us believing that a guy would bend over backwards just to be with the object of his affection, but this isn’t how real life works. And just because he’s been very sweet to you, and has clearly told you that he likes you, doesn’t necessarily mean he’s looking for something more.  

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September 2018