Remembering & Forgetting

KAPIL NAIDU explores the paradox of remembering and forgetting, and how he resolved it through experience. Along the way, he learned some important life lessons!

- KAPIL NAIDU

Kapil, take care, and remember not to forget.”

This was the last thing my Dad said to me at the airport when I was leaving for the US to pursue my undergraduate studies.

I chuckled and said, “Yeah, I won't Papa,” as I walked away.

I found the phrase quite funny at the time, and as I was completing my check-in I thought about it. “Remember not to forget.” What does that even mean?

I had a bad habit of forgetting things, and I was pretty ignorant of the fact for the longest time. As I was growing up, I remember my parents constantly telling me how I was leaving the shampoo bottle open, the front door wide open, to clean my room, and an endless list of things. These so-called “memory lapses” conveniently applied only to essential tasks.

As I was going to sleep one night at 7:30 p.m., I remembered I had a school project due the next day. I ran to my mom and said “Momma, I have a school project due tomorrow.” She didn’t look too surprised that I would pull such stunts with homework assignments, and she would make me finish them before I went to sleep. She asked me what the project was, and I said I had to take a model of the Egyptian pyramids to school the next day. Now, this was a shock even for her. She was infuriated and gave me a mouthful. But of course, the charm of unconditional motherly love eventually kicked in after she cooled down, and she sat with me till 1:00 a.m. essentially doing the project for me. Unfortunately for me, this was not the end of such events, and it took me many years to become less carefree and ignorant about things. To this day, this is still a work in progress.