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"I LEARNED BOUNDARIES AND SELF-LOVE AS MY GRANDMOTHER'S CAREGIVER"

First for Women

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November 18, 2024

After her mother and grandmother moved into her home, Shannon McCoy, 53, felt overwhelmed, frustrated and exhausted as she acclimated to sharing her space and taking on the role of a caretaker. But Shannon soon learned that to find true peace and strengthen their bonds, she must first set limits and carve out moments for herself

- GINA ROBERTS-GREY

"I LEARNED BOUNDARIES AND SELF-LOVE AS MY GRANDMOTHER'S CAREGIVER"

Shannon McCoy walks into her home after a long day at work. Seconds later, she’s bombarded with questions, requests and needs from her mother, 69, and grandmother, 85, who have been living with her since 2017. Frustrated, Shannon snaps at them. Their faces fall and her heart twinges. They just don’t understand. I need time for me, she thinks. I have to tell them how I really feel before this gets any worse. Here, Shannon shares her caregiving journey in her own words.

“My mom and grandmother always lived together—or in very close proximity to each other, so they have always been two peas in a pod. That meant when it eventually became apparent that my grandmother was no longer able to live independently—and my mother was unable to provide the level of care she needed—there was little question they would both come and live with me. My mother can still cook for herself and handle her own day-to-day care like bathing and dressing, but helping my grandmother alone was difficult.

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