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No regrets taking a detour to be a stay-at-home mum

The Straits Times

|

June 09, 2025

Some might feel that it was a waste to give up my education and job experience to be a homemaker, but the joy of seeing my children grow up is worth it

- Jane Ng

This month marks the third year of my return to full-time work after seven years as a stay-at-home mum.It would be a lie to say I don't sometimes think back to those years and miss the mentally carefree days.

My kids were younger then, so June holidays meant longer trips. We once drove to Cameron Highlands, making several leisurely stops along the way in Melaka and Kuala Lumpur.

These days, with the 19-year-old doing his national service and the 16-year-old preparing for her O-level examinations, the nine-year-old doesn't get to travel as much as her siblings did at her age.

Our family holidays were mostly budget-friendly ones to neighbouring countries, as we were living on a single income. I became adept at sourcing for accommodations that didn't break the bank, but were still clean and family-friendly. New, mid-tier hotels were often a good bet.

Even if we did not travel, I enjoyed chilling at home with the kids when they were out of school.

Of course, there were challenging days as a stay-at-home mum, especially since we did not have a helper. Like when I fell sick and still had to pick up the children from school and make sure they were fed. Or when I had to mediate the squabbles of tired and cranky kids.

I also had to juggle housework and making meals while managing the different schedules of three children. Or when I valiantly took on freelance writing assignments to stay relevant, working weekends, adding to the mothering duties I already had.

CHANGING THE NARRATIVE Stay-at-home mothers I have met over the years range from those who chose to be home to those whose decision was a necessity for their families.

While these mums were at peace with staying home, they did not always like the labels that went with it.

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