Water polo: A cult or a sport?

Making it into the school water polo team is the kids' latest status goal - but this applies to any sport (think rugby or football)

- Shaun Read

As yet another school holiday approaches, interrupted by a sports tour, many readers may come to the conclusion that their school-going child has joined a cult. I am, of course, referring to the water polo team.

What was once a minor sport at school has inexplicably risen to cult status among any school with an Olympic size swimming pool (so no township schools then). Like any cult, water polo now demands absolute loyalty from its followers. Rituals include attending practices at 6am or 8pm on a Friday night (presumably to deprive the participants and their parents of rest) and endless tournaments, especially during long weekends and school holidays. Failure to attend any of these rituals leads to possible excommunication (from the team).

Separating followers from society is the aim of any cult. Water polo achieves this in spades. Parents are easily sucked into the cult, lured by the attraction that their kids cannot play water polo with a screen glued to their face.

As a result, family friends can no longer attend social occasions because little Johnny or Susie is at a practice, a match or a tournament (and we don't want him/her/them excommunicated).

Organising a get-together with friends involves weeks of planning to find those precious few hours when there is not a water polo something-or-other happening that day.