Masters of escaping the scene of a crime

The Camellias, apartments for the independent over-60s, everyone knows that the hub of the known world is the laundry room.

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Here there are two washing machines and two dryers. The unwritten law is you may not use two washing machines at once. This blocks everyone else out for the duration of the wash programme, and then as your two lots of washing move on you block everyone else out of the two dryers. This is one quick way to become a social outcast and have your name muttered in the corridors.

Our two married couples are in a quandary - do they outface protesters by saying firmly: This machine has her wash and that machine has his wash' Or lose their nerve and shove as much as they can from both lots of washing into one machine, which means creases will be indelibly crushed in?

Mishandling of the machines causing breakdown or, heaven forbid, flooding results in anyone nearby heading as fast as maybe for their own flat and denying all involvement.