A Light in THE DARK

Alone on her birthday, Lucy wondered if wishes really did come true

- Sarah Dunnakey

The smoke from the candle lingered like a question mark.

A single candle on a slice of iced fruit cake, asking Lucy how come she was celebrating yet another birthday on her own.

She regretted blowing out the flame. She'd even forgotten to make a wish. She had considered buying 32 proper birthday candles. And a whole cake. But in the end had settled for the last slice of the one Mum had made for her at Christmas, and a stub of a candle she found in a plastic box labelled 'For emergencies'.

When Mark lived with her, there had been candles in every room of the flat. An elaborate candelabra he'd found in a junk shop on the dining table, vanillascented tea lights in the bedroom, and the purple, musky-smelling candles around the bath.

They were all long gone, as was Mark. He had moved out after a lengthy explanation about work pressure and needing space. But Lucy knew he had met someone else. He'd taken the purple candles with him.

****

She sighed and picked up the box of matches from the table.

You're only 32, she told herself.

There will be plenty more chances. The words weren't hers. They were her best friend Jen's. Jen, happily married, and never very keen on Mark, had seen his departure as a chance for Lucy to make a new start, 'fresh opportunities', 'a corridor of opening doors'. Jen worked in sales and was in Amsterdam that weekend on a business trip. She had already sent Lucy three motivational texts along with apologies for missing her special day.

Lucy wasn't sure she wanted any more opportunities, fresh or otherwise. What was the point when it always ended in heartbreak, and the good memories were overshadowed by the bad? She shook herself and told herself not to be so maudlin.

The cold, dark nights and short days at this time of year never helped her mood.