Healthy eating malarkey is just not to my taste

Apparently I'm not healthy. Says who? Well, everybody on TV, the NHS, the Government, joggers and people who don't eat things that have eyes.

- Andrew Haigh

The vegetarians I understand. I was one for many years and I still toy with the idea of not munching on animal corpses. Because that's what it is when you take it down to a basic level.

Enjoy your breakfast bacon butty by the way!

It's the TV harassment that really grinds my gears.

Spend more than half an hour parked in front of daytime viewing and there's bound to be a showoff chef, face to camera, smugness on full beam, deftly chopping veg, while viewers at home (or perhaps it's just me) and the camera operator, watch with rapt attention, hoping for the crunch of compromised digits.