Understanding lighthouse parenting: a guiding light in modern child-rearing

PARENTING is a journey filled with choices, and the decisions we make about how to raise our children can profoundly shape their lives.

- VUYILE MADWANTSI

Over the years, parenting styles have evolved, with terms like “helicopter parenting”, “gentle parenting”, and “authoritarian vs authoritative” becoming household phrases. Recently, a new approach to parenting has captured public interest: lighthouse parenting.

Search queries for “What is lighthouse parenting?” have surged, with the term gaining popularity as a middle ground between the extremes of overbearing helicopter parenting and overly permissive hands-off approaches.

But what exactly is lighthouse parenting, and why does it resonate with so many parents today? Coined by Dr Kenneth Ginsburg, a paediatrician and adolescent medicine specialist, lighthouse parenting is an approach that blends guidance and independence. In his book Raising Kids to Thrive, Ginsburg explains that parents should act as lighthouses: providing a steady beacon of guidance, setting clear expectations, and offering protection while allowing children the freedom to navigate their own paths.

Think of it this way: a lighthouse doesn't steer a ship but it ensures it stays safe by illuminating hazards and showing the way forward. Similarly, lighthouse parents are present and supportive but don’t micromanage their child’s every move, nor do they leave them entirely to their own devices.

The core principles of lighthouse parenting

1. Provide a safe harbour

Parents act as a source of emotional security, offering a loving and supportive environment where children feel safe to express themselves and take risks.

2. Set clear boundaries