CAN A NARCISSIST TRULY CHANGE? HERE'S WHAT PSYCHOLOGY SAYS

MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS

- VUYILE MADWANTSI

SCROLL through your Instagram, TikTok, or Twitter feed for just a few minutes, and you'll stumble over story times with words like trauma, boundaries, gaslighting, and the ever-trending term narcissist.

In South Africa, just like everywhere else, these terms are now part of our everyday conversations, from campus WhatsApp groups to personal relationships.

But behind the hashtags and headlines lies a deeper and more urgent question: Can a narcissist change? That question has never felt more relevant than now, as the world watches high-profile figures like Sean “Diddy” Combs face a public reckoning for alleged abuse and manipulation.

The stories are shocking, but for many South Africans, they're also painfully familiar. Whether it's a toxic boss, a controlling partner, or a charismatic friend who leaves emotional chaos behind, narcissism is no longer just a clinical label, it's a lived experience.

Understanding narcissism: beyond the stereotypes

It's easy to throw the term “narcissist” around, but what does it really mean? According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) includes traits like grandiosity, a constant need for admiration, lack of empathy, and manipulative behaviour. Kerry Rudman, a neurofeedback specialist and the founder of Brain Harmonics in South Africa, sees the impact of these traits first-hand.

According to her, these behaviours, including gaslighting, exploitation, and emotional detachment, leave a long trail of trauma for all involved.

Take the recent court testimony of Cassie Ventura, one of Combs’ ex-girlfriends. She described enduring years of emotional abuse, and her path to recovery led her to neurofeedback therapy, a cutting-edge brain training technique.