TIES THAT BIND

As theories on romance about fated meetings and invisible strings populate social media, Olivia Petter explores whether these mystical ideas are helpful or just leave you in a tangle

- By Olivia Petter

I was lying down in an east London basement with a knife in my right hand. A woman I'd never met before stood over me, shouting: “Cut!” Still yelling, the woman made a cutting motion in the air with her hands before splashing cold water onto my face. I cut the air above me with the knife... and silently wondered why I had paid £90 for this.

I was lying down in an east London basement with a knife in my right hand. A woman I'd never met before stood over me, shouting: “Cut!” Still yelling, the woman made a cutting motion in the air with her hands before splashing cold water onto my face. I cut the air above me with the knife... and silently wondered why I had paid £90 for this. That was the first and last time I visited a shaman. I'd been struggling with a breakup, and a particularly online friend suggested I try a cord-cutting ceremony. It was something she'd heard about on TikTok, an increasingly popular resource for relationship advice where delusion is rife and rationality is not. The idea behind cord-cutting, the friend explained, was that it would enable me to sever any lingering energetic and emotional ties to my ex.

This “ritual”, as it’s often described in videos, would allow me to move on for reasons that were never entirely clear, even after I asked my shaman to explain them. “It’s not a magic trick,” she reassured me shortly before circling me with a candle and repeating words in a language I didn’t recognise.

Cord-cutting is one of many popular romantic theories going viral on TikTok. There are several others, united by their spiritual origin and ideological framework revolving around fate, destiny, and other New Age higher powers. Think: soulmates, kindred spirits and karmic relationships.