Police learned nothing from Everard and still fail women

I still remember where I was when I heard the awful news about the rape and murder of Sarah Everard.

- VICTORIA RICHARDS

Women up and down the country were left mourning and frightened; we exchanged horrified WhatsApps, checked on each other every time we went out and came home, especially at night. We shared stories familiar to every one of us, swapped tips about how we carry our keys threaded through our fingers like weapons; about getting our phones out early to pre-dial 999; how we felt unable to go running after dark. We nodded with recognition when we talked of that instinctive need to “de- escalate” when we are approached by a man in a bar, of being calm and polite - even sweet - in the face of unwanted attention from a stranger. Why? Because we know, instinctively, that to respond in any other way could put us in danger.

Then, there are those of us for whom danger comes right to our doorstep. The friends who have been date-raped, drugged, and those of us who have checked boyfriends under Clare’s Law and called the police to report stalking and harassment. My teenage cousin’s drink was spiked just this month - she’s in her first term at university. I spent a period of time having to ask a friend to drop me home and wait with the engine running while I ran around the house turning every light on, checking behind doors and even inside the wardrobes, because of fear about an ex.

Those of us who have experienced violence or sexual attacks at the hands of men - often, both at once - recognise these behaviours only too well. We’re not fearful of rejection when we go on a first date with a stranger; we’re fearful for our lives.