Can Fragrances Help You Grieve?

Grief has no timeline, but a fragrance can help you accept the loss, and celebrate the life of the person you lost

- Sukriti Shahi

A couple of months ago, I read about Phulr's Missing Person fragrance. It was intriguing, to say the least. Having gone through the various stages of loss and grief, I wondered how that scent smells. It is said to smell like someone you miss the most. Apart from Phlur's Missing Person, Byredo's De Los Santos is another one that was created by its perfumer after he lost his father and close friend. It was created as a tribute to life well-lived, to celebrate it. Can there be a fragrance or notes that can define the gut-wrenching pain you feel when you miss the presence of someone you have lost? Is there a scent that can mimic the emotions you felt in the presence of that someone special?

My sister was in the last trimester of her pregnancy when she caught COVID-19; and while we frantically searched for a hospital bed and oxygen cylinder during the deadly second phase of the pandemic, our efforts fell short at the end. I've suffered loss before, I lost my grandfather, who I loved dearly, when I was seven; at 12, I lost my dog who I called my best friend, and a few relatives who I was fond of. I still didn't know how hard grief hits until I saw my sister for the last time. I spent days in bed not wanting to get up, shower, or eat. I would hold my nephew and cry for hours. I still cannot go back to old photos and chats, and the thought of letting go of her things sends shivers down my spine. So, when I read about Phulr's fragrance, it also angered me. If you have lost someone close and special, you don't have to smell a fragrance to acknowledge the absence of life, the emptiness, and the guilt you feel at the slightest feeling of joy.