A tricky MOMENT

Some questions just shouldn’t be asked

- Rosie x

As the great feminist thinker Tammy Wynette so vividly reminds us, sometimes it’s hard to be a woman. Yet it seems that life as a man isn’t always a bowl of cherries eaten on a bed of roses, while watching Match of the Day. As Mr Dear complained the other day, men have to be so cautious and diplomatic.

‘Is there anything about me that you find really irritating?’ I had asked.

Mr D suddenly looked terrified. ‘You mean apart from the fact that you suddenly ask questions that could land me in the divorce court?’ he said. ‘You’ve never wanted to know that before. Why now?’

He then thought for a moment, and what a noble sight this is. The eyes narrow and the hand goes up to the chin. You can virtually see the machinery of thought cranking into action. Just imagine what he could achieve on a diet of oily fish and spinach and other brain boosters.

‘Just a minute,’ he said after about 30 seconds of this feverish activity. ‘I know – there’s something about me that you find irritating and this is simply your way of getting round to telling me what it is.’

‘Not at all,’ I said. ‘I was just curious.’