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Help! I Can't Stop Cyber-Stalking People From My Past

Cosmopolitan India

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September - October 2023

Daily social media scroll starting to spiral? Our advice colurnnist, Minaa B., helps you get a handle on your habit.

- Minaa B

Help! I Can't Stop Cyber-Stalking People From My Past

Dear Minaa,

I am low-key obsessive about checking in on people I used to know. Every time I open up my phone for a mindless swipe 'n' scroll, I mentally run through a checklist of people I like to keep virtual tabs on. My newly-married ex from uni? On The List: my former secondary school BFF who's now a mum of two and the proud new owner of a second home? Also on the same are a slew of other now-strangers I haven't spoken to for a while now.

Let me clarify that I don't truly care about these people, like my friend's mum who recently divorced her husband and married her much younger contractor. I am really only invested in their posts-not their actual lives, which for the most part are super different from my own.

If I am not online, I'm not thinking about them at all. Yet, I just can't stop myself from checking up on them, even though I promise I don’t actually want to know the name of my ex’s new puppy (it’s Ruby) or anything about my former netball coach’s MLM hustle. So, my question is: what’s going on and why can’t I quit? Is it normal to know so many details of super-random people’s day-to-day? I would love to physically and emotionally unfollow these people and get back so much wasted time.

Dear Reader,

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