DECOR IS UTTERLY HIDEOUS

MY house looks like a brothel.

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I went abroad to see my sister. I returned to discover my partner has redecorated our beautiful Victorian terrace as a “surprise”.

Out are the stylish greens and creams I lovingly chose and applied back in 2020. In are bright red walls that scream “abattoir”.

In our bedroom he's hand-painted a huge mural that depicts two naked lovers entwined on an open shell. There are nymphs, bare bottoms and large bosoms all over it.

He says it's erotic. I say it’s hideous. It’s nightmarish and not helped by the numerous wall and ceiling mirrors he’s erected.

Down in the basement he’s installed adult toys and neon lights and a sex swing to make a “fun room”. He thinks we should have swinging parties with mates.