THE GREAT BRITISH SUMMER!

The Woman's Own columnist on silly season, pets and why couples should argue

- DAWN NEESOM

As the season creeps upon us, have we got rose-tinted glasses on?

Absolutely no idea how it got to be May, but suddenly here we are, whether we like it or not. According to that saucy old ditty, at this time of year we're meant to be getting frisky outdoors, while at the same time 'ne'er casting a clout till May is out'. Clout is an old-fashioned word for clothing, so if you're going to have a roll in the, er, rolling hills of our green and pleasant land, don't forget your thermals. But it's true, isn't it? Come May, the madness of Brits and our summer season unleashes in a floaty, floral-frocked hell.

Take the horse racing. A peculiarity of the British summer where Ladies Day means anything but. OK, there are some - Zara Tindall, for example - who are aware that there are horses running around, but most of us view the likes of the Derby and Royal Ascot as an opportunity to ogle posh gals in ridiculous hats and impractical heels redefining the word 'lady'.

Would we like to go, though? Well, neigh doubt. Because when it comes to people-watching, there's no better entertainment than (posh) Brits at play.