Like a summer fling, cricket slows down time

In the first of a monthly series, Marie Le Conte tries to find a game she can fall in love with

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I go for a walk around the grounds and ask an affable middle-aged man — one of many here ~ why I should enjoy cricket. “It’s good if you have a day to spare,” he tells me, which both helps and doesn’t.

I am here as part of an attempt to watch one new sport a month, in the hope of finding one that suits my tastes. I'm over 30, childfree and underemployed, and in dire need of away to spend my acres of free time. Yes, my diamond shoes are a bit tight actually, thanks for noticing.

I ask someone else for a sales pitch and they seem confused by the premise of the question. Would you ask a fish why it enjoys the ocean? I arrived at Lord’s at 11am with two things: a desire to see if cricket could become my sport of choice, and a mild hangover I would term “globulous”. Sometimes you drink too much and, the next day, the whole world feels spiky. Today, I feel like someone wrapped my brain in cotton wool, and my heart is full of gentle love for my fellow man.