MY OFF-GRID STRIFE

Tiffanie Darke is learning some hard truths about sustainable living as she looks after a high-maintenance finca in Ibiza

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In London, home is a terraced house built by the Victorians to house workers for the nearby cattle market (now a park, clock tower and cafe). Living snugly together, my neighbours and I share heat, views, glasses of wine in the garden, the occasional noise dispute, dog, cat and goldfish sitting, and lots of gossip as we see each other on the street all day every day and our windows look directly into each other’s lives.

I turn on the tap and water comes out. I turn the dial on the thermostat when I want to be warmer. I open the windows for a through draft in the summer, but it’s not enough as our summers are getting hotter. I pay about £130 a month for water, £400 for energy and £250 to the council, for which I get our lovely bin men coming every week and some street lighting. The money comes out of my account without my noticing until there’s nothing left at the end of the month. We fitted one of those smart meters and realised leaving the lights on made no difference whatsoever - it was the tumble dryer that did it.