Weddings Are Loud, Marriages Are Silent

In India, marriage is more than a personal choice—it is a cultural milestone, a family festival, and a carefully choreographed spectacle.

- SHWETA MAHENDRA

The rituals are ancient, the celebrations enormous, and the expectations sky-high. Priests chant mantras, designers create matching outfits, drones hover to capture cinematic moments, and every gesture is broadcast across social media. It seems sacred. It feels important. But beneath all this glitter, one question quietly lingers:

Are we truly prepared for what marriage means?

Among the many mantras recited during Hindu weddings, one stands out for its simplicity and seriousness: "Shubh Mangalam Savdhaan"—This is auspicious. This is holy. Be alert.

And yet, that alertness is rarely present. We prepare for the wedding, not for the marriage. We focus on lighting and guest lists, not on communication and compatibility. The sacred Panigrahan Sanskar—where the groom holds the bride's hand and vows to walk with her in dharma and joy—is often treated as a backdrop for photos. The Saptapadi, the seven steps around the fire, is interrupted for camera angles. Couples vow to stay together for seven lifetimes without fully knowing how to be together for seven days.

The ritual ends. The guests leave. The music fades. And two people—often strangers in arranged marriages—begin a life they may be emotionally unprepared for.

The horrifying Raja Raghuvanshi case in May 2025 exemplifies the extreme darkness of this disconnect. A newlywed businessman, allegedly murdered by his wife during their honeymoon, left the nation stunned. The marriage had been solemnised with fire and mantras. Yet, behind the symbols lay betrayal, violence, and possibly a premeditated plot. Although exceptional in its brutality, the case raises a broader truth: when sacred rituals are used as social camouflage, the consequences can be devastating.