It's never too late to make new friends

CHRIS DUFFY ISN'T GOING TO SUGARcoat it: making friends as an adult is hard.

- ANGELA HAUPT

If you've ever tried to figure out exactly how to ask a potential platonic connection for their number-or word that first follow-up text-you know what he's talking about. "It's mortifying," he says. "It requires being vulnerable and cringeworthy and putting yourself out there."

Social awkwardness aside, it's simply harder to meet new people when you no longer have shared high school classes or a college dorm room, says Duffy, author of Let's Hang Out: Making (and Keeping) Friends, Acquaintances, and Other Nonromantic Relationships. Add in long work hours, a fear of rejection, and lack of trust, and it's no wonder many people struggle to form new bonds.

Yet despite these obstacles, it's important to invest time and energy into growing your community: friendships keep us mentally and physically healthy. We asked Duffy and other experts how to approach making new friends through different life stages.

Early adulthood

Your 20s are the ideal time to start reflecting on your own friendshipbuilding style-knowledge that will serve you for the rest of your life. In part, that means figuring out whether you're a joiner or an initiator, says Nina Badzin, who hosts the podcast Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. As a joiner, you'll make it a point to proactively opt in to activities or events you find interesting, like dance classes, a kickball league, or a professional networking group. If you're an initiator, you'll step up to organize get-togethers. "Maybe you invite two people, and those two people invite two people," she says. Being a joiner and being an initiator both require conscious effort; knowing which you are will help you determine the best approach to making friends.