Rage Remedies

EXPERTS EXPLAIN HOW TO OWN AND HEALTHILY EXPRESSYOUR DIFFICULT EMOTIONS.

- Olivia Evans

When digital creator Heaven Marley went through her first big breakup last year, she wasn't sure how to process it. "I'm the kind of person who bottles up my feelings and just acts okay," she says. "I didn't have any closure." Her best friend noticed her struggling and had an idea. "We ended up in a rage room," says the 20-year-old student.

The women visited an "aggression arena," or a place with rooms full of materials you can break for a fee. Some were filled with dishes, while another included a car you could destroy. Marley started breaking glasses, then leveled up to the car r

Now, you don't have to destroy a vehicle to net a satisfying emotional release. However, the time Marley spent smashing objects did help her sit with her feelings, which is an important step, experts say. First of all, know that upsetting emotions and the situations that cause them-aren't all the same.

But they're there for a reason: to tell us something. And you should pay attention, says Andy Thomson, MD, a psychiatrist at the University of Virginia.

When negative emotions hit, you can usually tell where they come from, whether it's as astronomical as a breakup or as minute as someone cutting you off in traffic. For some people, it may feel easier to sweep them under the rug than to recognize they're there. Here's why you shouldn't do that: Suppressing your emotions can make you more prone to stress, says Emily Willroth, PhD, an assistant professor of psychological and brain sciences at Washington University in St. Louis. When we bottle them up, it leads to increased activation of our sympathetic nervous system, which is the body's response to danger. Instead, "it's helpful to think about all emotions, good or bad, as serving a purpose," she says.