My preferred sexual positions can skew toward the ambitiously acrobatic.

Should you care to look inside my bedside drawer, you’d find more accessories than an HSN host’s forearm—handcuffs, black rubber tape, and electrically charged fingertip vibes, to name a few. The only aspect of sex that I’m unfussy about is gender—my own and my partners’. I actually chronicle my crazy experiences in my new book, Action: A Book About Sex. So here’s a fact you might not expect from me: Some of the hottest encounters I’ve ever had were regulardegular, conventional-as-air vanilla sex.

Yes, here I am championing the most basic way of going at it. But toys are great, you say! Or, what about that insecure voice in the back of my head that says the way I fuck is not sexy enough? Well, that voice can borrow my electrical tape for its mouth.

When I think of the best sex I’ve ever had, I recall how it felt, both in my body and in my brain. I’m picturing how one dude traced my body with his hand sooo slowly or the girl who liked to leave in the middle of parties to go home together, right then. Skipping out on all the extras makes it easier to be present and focus on how bad I really want my partner. I mean, think of the steamiest movie sex scenes, like in Blue Is the Warmest Color or Cruel Intentions. Save for a bed, all the characters need to have extremely hot-looking sex is each other—urgently.