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Single Moms & Loving Again

Femina

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May 2022

Four single moms lay bare their journeys of loss, loneliness and longing to Ritu Ailani

- Ritu Ailani

Single Moms & Loving Again

Love is elusive for single mothers in Indian society – not only because of the ordeal of pulling out of a bad marriage, and the worry of how your child will perceive your new relationship, but also because of the ever-so-prevalent stigma around single mothers taking a second chance on love. Yet, there are women out there who have managed to free themselves from these shackles and found love again. Of course, love looked different for each of them the second time around: For some, it meant getting married again; for others, it meant loving themselves above anyone else. Either way, these women had the courage to go for what they’ve always deserved.

DEVINA KAUR Author, social entrepreneur, single mother to a 14-year-old daughter

Raised in a conservative Assamese family, Devina was married off at a very young age. Her daughter was still a baby when she realised her marriage wasn’t working out and called it quits. Her parents relentlessly tried to make them reconcile and suggested they have more children, but she had already made up her mind. The decision was met with shock, disbelief and judgement from her kith and kin; some even severed ties with her. She became a social outcast for no longer having the ‘protection’ of a man. “Our parents always want the best for us, but their conditioning often limits us from living an authentic life,” she says. “As women, we have to unlearn everything we have been taught by society and come into our own.”

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