RAISING A BRAT? TIME FOR A RESET!

It happens, even with the best of intentions. Sometimes we go overboard trying to show our love – and then things backfire.

NICOLA DAVIES-LAUBSCHER

Get your pencil out… If you tick“yes” on more than half of the statements and questions below, you might be spoiling your child rotten. If so, we’ve got a plan to turn things around. In. One. Month.

YOUR CHILD’S BEHAVIOUR

• My child is self-centred and shows little empathy.

• My child does not respect boundaries or authority.

• My child does not take responsibility for his decisions.

• My child is critical of others. • My child blames others when he is unhappy and feels that life is unfair if things don’t go his way.

• My child likes to feel superior. • He doesn’t share easily. • He expects to be praised all the time. • My child expects to receive all the time, but isn’t keen on giving.

• My child gives up easily.

YOUR BEHAVIOUR

• Do you usually give in if your child nags

for long enough in the shops for a sweet or toy?

• Do you feel guilty for not spending enough time with your child?

• Does it feel as if everything you expect from your child has to be tied to a reward?

• Do you like buying your child the best and latest toys?

• Do you intervene and take over whenever you notice your child battling with something?

• Do you try and avoid tears and unhappiness at all costs?

• Have family or friends ever mentioned that your child is naughty or has bad manners?

• Do you and your partner have very different ideas about discipline?

• Do you believe that one day his teachers will teach him manners?

• When you return from travels, what is he most interested in: Seeing you or the gift you’ve brought?

Children need to be taught how to behave if we expect them to learn this. Teachers have their hands full with children who simply refuse to participate in activities that they find too boring or difficult and who won’t take responsibility for their own mistakes.

Babies younger than 6 months oldexpress their needs by crying, and you can’t spoil a baby by meeting these needs. But as a child grows, there is a danger that they learn that they always get their way when they have a crying fit.