Claiming the WILDNESS WITHIN

AT 3.17 am, somewhere deep in the Addo Elephant National Park, I was barely awake but still moving.

- Emma van der Merwe

The bush was alive with the rustle of unseen creatures. The stars felt frozen in place, and the moon sat low and full like it had been keeping watch all night. My headlamp lit up just a sliver of the trail. My eyes stung, my feet ached, and everything in me begged to stop.

With about 14 hours to go, 90 km into the biggest physical challenge I'd ever faced, I kept moving. I was on my way to completing my first 100-mile (165 km) trail race: the Addo Elephant Trail Run, known as Africa’s Wildest Ultra.

The race winds through remote sections of the Addo Elephant Park, following footpaths, jeep track and rough, technical terrain. You face serious heat, long hours of darkness, and the strange mix of beauty and fear that comes with running past wild animals in the middle of the night. A hundred miles on foot might sound extreme – and it is – but that’s part of the pull. There’s something deeply human about pushing beyond what you thought was possible, and finding out who you are when there's no one around to clap or cheer. That's the real thrill: not just finishing, but also discovering the hidden version of you that shows up when things get hard.

Not too long ago, the thought of me running 165 km would've sounded completely crazy. I'd left a career I loved to be a stay-at-home mom, something I chose wholeheartedly. But somewhere in the busy, beautiful chaos of raising two small boys, I stopped dreaming big for myself. My world became about their needs, their routines, and slowly mine fell away. I kept saying, 'I'll get back to that one day.' But I learnt the hard way: 'One day' doesn’t magically arrive. You have to go out and find it.