Have we lost the art of conversation?

In a world of thumbs-up emojis and one-way voice memos, are we forgetting how to converse? The Weekly engages in an experiment in listening and genuine two-way chatting.

- ALLEY PASCOE

The Friday knock-off drinks were casual, but I was nervous. I was meeting my fiancé's new work colleagues for the first time, and I wanted to make a good impression. On the way to the pub, I rehearsed some small talk in my mind. "How was your day, Alley?" "Great, thanks! I finally finished a book manuscript I've been working on for five months. Cheers to that." In my imaginary conversation, I clinked schooners with my new acquaintances in celebration.

In real life, however, the cheers-ing didn't happen - because the question never came.

Sitting at a table in the beer garden, I happily introduced myself to my fiancé's team. Excitedly, I asked about the week that was and the weekend ahead. Curious, I asked about the big project they were working on, their roles and how they got into the field.

With every question, I waited for the serve to be returned. And waited. But my questions weren't reciprocated.

I realised I wasn't playing conversational tennis; I was hitting a ball against a brick wall.

Don't get me wrong - the people I met in the beer garden weren't intentionally being rude or unsociable. They simply weren't engaging in a two-way conversation. I'm a journalist - I ask questions for a living - so I wasn't fazed by doing the heavy lifting.

Although I couldn't help but wonder (how very Carrie Bradshaw of me): Have we lost the art of conversation? Having the thought was like finding my first grey hair. Once I started spotting signs, I couldn't stop seeing them. Traces of the downfall of real talk were everywhere.

A former colleague, who had a baby at the start of the year, confessed that she can't remember the last conversation she had that wasn't about the baby. My hairdresser revealed her apprentice suddenly quit when she gently suggested she could work on her small talk with clients.