Guiding teens through ROMANTIC EMOTIONS

My 14-year-old daughter is developing romantic interests and experiencing the effects of peer pressure and media.

- SUSHMA GOPALAN

How can I help her manage these emotions in a healthy, balanced way? — Ruha Sinha, Bengaluru

Teenage crushes are acts of rehearsal, not rebellion. During adolescence, the limbic brain system — which drives emotion and impulsivity — matures far earlier than the prefrontal cortex, the centre of judgement and self-regulation. As a result, emotions often surge ahead of reason. Acknowledging this developmental reality helps parents navigate this turbulent stage with empathy. Research also shows that transparent, open parent-adolescent communication is associated with fewer risky behaviours and healthier emotional adjustment (Smetana et al., 2015, Child Development).

Here are my suggestions:

• Model healthy relationships. Let your child witness kindness, respect, and mutual admiration in your relationship with your husband/partner.

• Remain calm and approachable. Keep conversations non-judgemental, listen attentively, and create space for honest dialogue.

• Discuss values, not prohibitions. Focus on respect, boundaries, and self-worth rather than a list of rules.

• Normalise attraction. Acknowledge that romantic feelings are a natural part of growth while guiding her through the emotional complexity that comes with it.

My ten-year-old daughter is becoming very demanding and materialistic. How can I change her attitude?