The Chatgroups That Forged a Community of Mums

Sharing good deals on Telegram led to unexpected friendships — it's something we can all benefit from.

- Diane Leow

Like most Singaporeans, I'm a sucker for a good deal. If there's a product I need to purchase, you'll find me perusing various online platforms until I'm convinced I have found the best price (or cashback, or credit card deal).

While I've always liked searching out the cheapest prices, this habit became a compulsion when I became a mother. During the pandemic, I was introduced to group buying — a way for individuals to gain access to bulk discounts without, well, buying in bulk. Instead, folks in the same neighbourhood would band together to hit a minimum order to unlock a cheaper price for goods of any variety. This could range from instant noodles and cakes to electronic appliances...the list goes on.

It's not surprising that other mums have the same tendencies I have, considering how much money we spend on our children. I'm guessing that's why such communities flourish among mums — and sometimes dads — because we want to provide the best for those around us, at the lowest cost possible.

It went beyond simply sharing good deals. In the recesses of my memory that is the fourth trimester, I hazily recall asking for advice from mothers I've never met, about almost anything under the sun. Questions included poop frequencies, how to get rid of colic, how to decide on a preschool, and more.

Some mums responded in earnest. One sent over a set of silverette cups in the middle of the night because I mentioned I couldn't find mine. Another offered a listening ear at all hours because she, too, was up breastfeeding her little one. Confined to my armchair, it felt like I was connected to this community I've never seen nor met, and I was grateful for what they represented even after the chatgroups died their natural death in a post-pandemic world.