The Crossing Guard

David Sedaris

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You deserve all you get when you stand in the way of an American man just doin’ his job

After the latest shooting in Minneapolis a number of people have said - and rightly so — that this is what happens ~ and should! -when you get in the way of men trying io do their jobs. In this case it was ICE agents tasked with rooting out illegals, but that’s just one example.

Before I retired I worked as a crossing guard at a cherished elementary school — the one I'd gone to, as a matter of fact. The pay wasn’t much, but it was work nevertheless. So I was at it one day when this car came to a halt and the driver stuck her head out the window. “Excuse me,’ she called. “Why are you making me stop when there are no children around?” She looked at her watch. “School won't be out for another hour”