WHEN FRIENDS BECOME FAMILY

Fifi Donnison, 44, got through the toughest times thanks to some very special people

- MISHAAL KHAN

Sitting in bed with my partner Mark, then 42, while he flicked through Netflix, I couldn’t stop thinking about what I’d just found. It was September 2020 and earlier that day, I’d spotted a Facebook post encouraging people to check their breasts. I’d never done it before, so while in bed with Mark, I’d had a quick feel. As I’d prodded and poked my right breast, I’d found it. A firm, grape-sized lump.

Not wanting to worry Mark, I kept it to myself. But the next day, I took my children, Dexter, then eight, and Stanley, six, swimming with my friend, Kirstie, 45. I’d known Kirstie for years. Her son Harry was good friends with Dexter and the two of us had built a strong bond. I knew I could confide in her and the lump had been on my mind all morning. So while we were in the pool, and the boys distracted, I ask her to feel it. ‘I found it last night,’ I told her. Kirstie looked at me, worried. ‘You need to get that checked out,’ she urged.

I knew she was right, but a part of me was in denial. Instead, back at home, I contacted another friend, Karen, 47, who I knew had found a few non-cancerous cysts in her breasts over the years. ‘I’m sure you’ll be OK but you should still see a doctor,’ she said.

Still, I just couldn’t find the courage to phone my GP. It sounds silly, but I was frightened and, although I was convinced it was cancer, still I decided I’d rather not know. I suppose I knew that as soon as I did, everything would change.