Follow your curiosity, find your purpose

My mother’s death at one hundred years old rocked my world.

- LAURIE SUE BROCKWAY

I had spent years as her caregiver, while also caring for my son with health issues, while also working as an emotional health reporter and minister. Grief, on top of a series of other losses—loved ones dying, day job lost, son moving out, and everything that came along with the pandemic—took me on a path of sadness and compassion burnout. One day, I just fell to my knees and cried. It lasted for about 18 months. My husband held me together. At 62, I was rudderless and had no idea who I was anymore. I had no clear purpose.

Then, I had a magical wakeup call.

It hit like a bolt of lightning: I had not hit a dead end. I had entered my wisdom years.

I came across a quotation from the T.H. White book The Once and Future King, from a scene in which King Arthur goes into the woods to consult his mentor, Merlin, about how to deal with sadness. “The best thing for being sad,” replied Merlin, beginning to puff and blow, “is to learn something. That’s the only thing that never fails.”

It hit like a bolt of lightning: I had not hit a dead end. I had entered my wisdom years.

Instead of focusing on the challenges that accompanied my entrance into my 60s, I decided to allow my curiosity and interests to lead me on a journey. I gave myself one full year. I decided to take Merlin’s word for it, and I somehow understood that when the brain is learning, the heart and soul are nourished. I sat down and gave some thought to what I wanted to learn and why, and divided the learning journey into three paths.