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LET COUNSELLOR KEREN LIGHTEN YOUR LOAD

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Trying to be diplomatic

Q My neighbour's nine-year-old daughter knocks on our door most afternoons and asks if she can come and chat. She's looked after by a woman her parents have employed to do after-school care. She's a sweet child but we don't want her here every day. I'm wondering if I should say something to her parents? Sarah, Nuneaton

A I'm curious as to what your concerns are about saying something. As long as you're nice about the child when you explain what's been happening, I'm sure they won't respond unfavourably. I think there are two issues here - one, her visiting too often, and the other, why she isn't comfortable being at home with the carer? All parents would want to know that there might be a potential problem at home, so they can solve the issue.

I feel belittled

Q I went out to dinner recently with my family. I have arthritis and sometimes struggle to use my hands. Without asking me, my daughter leant over and cut up my meat. I'm sure she was trying to be kind, but it made me feel old and small. Should I say something? Alison, Ipswich