The Woman's Own columnist has her say on baby names, pants and pantries

JUST HOW POSH ARE YOU?

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Apparently your 'pantry' reveals all the answers...

One of the scariest things you can do in our house is open the kitchen cupboard.

There's stuff in there older than the Dead Sea Scrolls. And as for the fridge... not even in Stephen King's worst nightmares is there anything as terrifying.

In fact, I'm convinced that the famous vomiting scene from The Exorcist was inspired by the weird green stuff lurking in the darkest recesses of our chiller draw. Animal, vegetable or mineral? Who the hell knows? Or is brave enough to find out? To be fair, the husband did once buy some weird herb stuff in one of those plastic tubs, but you'd probably be better off smoking it now.

So maybe it'll come as much as a shock to you as it did me that people now judge you on what's in your kitchen.

Or rather pantry.

You know, like they'll judge you on how trendy your clothes are - barrel jeans and Samba trainers evidently - and the kind of car you drive.