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All in her head

The Australian Women's Weekly

|

September 2025

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can seem the trend de jour, with endless celebrity social posts. But for thousands of Australian women, learning they have the condition can be life-changing.

- CLAIRE BURKE

All in her head

Sarah Hayden describes discovering she has ADHD when she was aged 48 as a cathartic experience.

The mum-of-five, social worker, author and equine-assisted psychotherapist had built a life she loved – a mishmash of roles that suited her busy brain and need to keep many irons in the fire. But learning she had ADHD helped her better understand herself and why she had always felt out of step amid the rules of a neurotypical world.

“As a kid, I was intelligent and capable, but I struggled with everything,” Sarah, now 51, recalls. “I’d walk into class and the teacher would say ‘ready for today’s exam?’ and I’d be like ‘what exam’?

“I didn’t have friends – I bounced between groups, nothing was consistent.”

She remembers young boys in class who likely had ADHD being loud, fidgety and disruptive, while she would be drawing pictures in her maths book, writing poems or daydreaming.

As an adult, while passionate, curious and energetic, she struggled to apply her focus to a particular area. “For years I flipped between jobs,” she says. “I prefer to be unemployed and have no money than be bored.

“I’ve started and dropped out of so many diplomas and degrees – my HECS debt is enormous. I’ve also signed up to short courses on a moment’s inspiration, paid upfront, then forgotten about it until textbooks for a yoga teaching course show up in the mail.

“That hasn’t happened once, it’s happened multiple times.”

What does ADHD look like in women?

Long seen as a condition affecting “naughty little boys”, ADHD in girls – who are more likely to seem distracted, forgetful or quietly daydreaming – often went unnoticed, leaving them to manage their struggles alone.

“Our [traditional] understanding of ADHD has been that stereotypical, wiggly little boy calling out in class,” says University of Queensland researcher Dr Kate Witteveen, who has led a study into the impact of ADHD diagnosis on women.

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