It's All Different Now

MARY KERRIGAN is a Vital Space Maker. She creates vital spaces full of light, where everyone belongs. An architect-placemaker and conservation specialist, for more than 25 years she has been a leading advocate for cultural and spatial change, active in the most intractable circumstances, to powerful effect. Here, she shares some ideas on how to overcome loneliness.

- MARY KERRIGAN

Courtney and I used to be next-door neighbors in our small adjoining cottages along the side of the country road. Until she and her boyfriend found a bigger apartment nearby.

Surprised to see her behind the counter in the village convenience store, I'm curious to learn whether she's still working in the call center up the road, as she was due to start there after she moved out.

"Oh no. I gave up that job. I was fed up with working from home, sitting looking into a computer screen all day, seeing no one," she says.

It got me thinking. The pandemic forced thousands of us into remote working. And there were pluses, no doubt. Released from the grinding daily commute meant more time at home with friends and family, for those who had them.

Now it's a thing, full-time and hybrid. How many of us are spending endless days sitting in our kitchens or bedrooms looking into computer screens? Maybe never seeing a human being from one end of the day to the next - especially if we live alone.

For us introverts, it seems fantastic. No need to give out all our energy in noisy, crowded, open plan offices or turbocharged conferences.

"Connection is why we're here. We are hardwired to connect with others, it's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering." -Brené Brown

While Teams, Google Meet, and Zoom were undoubted lifelines saving hundreds and thousands from the pain of a total solitary confinement lockdown reality, the truth is, existing primarily in a virtual world is no substitute for IRL, the real deal.

A post-pandemic visit to a university friend in Greater London pops into my head. She's been working for a local authority for years. Covid-19 lands and she's working from home, five days a week.