Why talking to strangers is a skill we can't afford to lose

In an era dominated by screens, face-to-face conversations are becoming increasingly rare. It's time to step out of our comfort zones.

- Julien Cayla

I gave my Singaporean students a new assignment recently: Come up with ideas for a new bubble tea shop on campus. But there was a catch. They had to walk around campus, talk to strangers, and come back with insights about what people their age think about bubble tea. To my surprise, many students didn't rush out to do this timed exercise.

Instead, they opened their laptops and started making PowerPoint slides. I had to gently nudge them towards the exit and encourage them to talk to strangers.

Admittedly, the Covid-19 pandemic severely limited my students' face-to-face interactions, and its effects are still being felt today. A recent survey by the Institute of Policy Studies at NUS found that more than half of Singaporeans and permanent residents aged 21 to 34 sometimes feel anxious about face-to-face interactions. In contrast, only about a third of respondents aged 50 and above feel the same.

Younger generations are spending less time socializing in person and more time communicating online. In the US, for example, research has shown that teenagers spend much less time communicating face-to-face with their friends than previous generations. In the late 1970s, 52 per cent of high school seniors met up with friends almost every day. By 2017, that percentage had dropped to 28 per cent. This decline in face-to-face meetings accelerated after 2010 and coincided with the increasing use of smartphones and social media.

In a world of cellphones and social media, opportunities to talk to strangers face to face are becoming scarce. A recent survey found that teenagers in Singapore spend almost 8.5 hours a day in front of screens. No surprise, then, that my students, like many young people, struggle to engage with strangers offline. With digital interactions becoming the norm, face-to-face interactions have become daunting.