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TO BE LOVED IS TO LOVE

The Philippine Star

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December 05, 2025

I grew up believing in happy endings. Fairytales taught me that princesses always found their prince, and that love was life’s ultimate reward. I was a hopeless romantic at heart — the type who giggled at the corniest movies, got giddy over cheesy characters, and teared up at romantic comedies. My friends would laugh at me, but I never minded. I was born with so much love to give that I thought it was impossible not to find it someday.

- By EUNICE REYES.

TO BE LOVED IS TO LOVE

Art by JANINA VALDEZ

Unfortunately for me, I grew up in a generation where romantic love rarely came neatly packaged. It was messy and confusing, never quite like the movies where strangers stumble into a meet-cute and kiss in the rain, or the books where sworn enemies slowly turn into lovers. Instead, my generation gave us new ways to define, or avoid defining, love: situationships, talking stages, mutual understandings. There are so many labels that sometimes you lose track of what's real.

I mostly had talking stages: the in-between phase where you're not officially dating, but you're constantly talking. It’s the Gen Z way of “almost dating” and sharing every detail of your day, messaging each other from morning until midnight, acting like a couple without ever claiming the title. But the truth is, these talking stages often stack up like unfinished chapters, leaving you with stories that never quite turn into something real. We tell ourselves to keep waiting, to keep hoping, but the waiting gets heavier. Each almost-love that slips away feels like proof that maybe we're not meant for the happy endings we dreamed of. And yet, we keep holding on, because that’s what hopeless romantics do. We choose to believe, even when believing feels like the most foolish thing of all.

Dating apps and situationships are so prevalent that Gen Zs can no longer distinguish the genuine feeling of love. It would always be a question of, “Mahal ko ba talaga siya or ang cute lang kasi ng dog sa dating profile niya?” or “Mahal ko na ba siya or kinikilig lang ako kasi ngayon lang ako nakaranas ng bare minimum?” More often than not, we end up confusing love with the act of romanticizing someone to fit the version we wish they could be.

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